Randomness. That what my thoughts feel like.

Isn’t it weird that actual randomness cannot be computed, that it is mathematically in expressible – though it exists. That it is imitated artificially using prime numbers and the time.

The ground principle of life. Randomness. Newton’s three-body problem. The unpredictability, unpredictable and thus not repeatable. Probably it makes sense that randomness cannot be (re)produced by a computer, by ones and zeroes.

Numbers. Prime numbers. Identity through the prime factorization. Every single one is different from the others. The numbers may have a same prime number in their factorization, they have something in common, but still they’re different, individuals.

Prime numbers would be ancestors. The high numbers the smallest children. Their factorization their parents, ordered from biggest to smallest.

So people are not even that different to numbers probably. How would a mathematician react if I told him that he actually adds and multiplies people, or a philosopher that he actually thinks about the morals of numbers?

Okay, they most likely would just tell me that I’m crazy. And maybe that’s true. You never know. How can I be sure that I am not crazy and everybody around me is just acting as if I was sane, because they don’t want me to know and/or feel bad about it?

No answer to that, at least not a final one. Although, how would they manage to make every person I ever meet know about me. Wouldn’t that be quite impossible to do? Especially thinking that I would not be the only crazy person. Because although people might be as individual as numbers (or maybe even more individual), there is some alikeness, some patterns going through.

Ok, so let’s just pretend that I am for sure not crazy, to simplify this a bit.

And what does crazy actually mean? Different form the usual? But isn’t that what the whole Individuality-thing is about: Being different? So is crazy actually bad? Or does crazy just mean that nobody understands that person? Is everything that does not fit into our society’s pattern crazy? Or is crazy what cannot be explained rationally? Would that mean that randomness is crazy?  Because we can’t recreate it, because we cannot explain it? And what can be explained rationally after all? People can’t, because if every person would only act rationally, then we would have no three-body problem applied to people.

So the definition of crazy is actually quite random and based on the understanding of the world of a majority, or on the society. Maybe being crazy means actually objectively not being crazy.

Maybe – just maybe – being crazy isn’t so bad after all.


Well, that was my stream of consciousness today. Hope you liked it. (:

– Ben


This is part of writing 101. The prompt was: “Today, take twenty minutes to free write. And don’t think about what you’ll write. Just write.”

The beginning

I am bad at beginnings. I just never know what to say or write or do, because I always think about annoying the other person or anything. I would like it much better if you could just pretend that I know everyone already and just talk freely without overthinking. Or to say it with the words of Kathleen Kelly:

“I like to start my notes to you as if we’re already in the middle of a conversation. I pretend that we’re the oldest and dearest friends, as opposed to what we actually are, people who don’t know each other’s names.”

So that is what I plan to do on here in the future, and for now I just hope you enjoy the picture. (: